The problem with today’s society is that knowledge is limitless. All the information you could ever want is almost always just a click away. But welcome to cyberworld –where nothing is really as they seem.
When people immerse in media — be it in words, music, still or moving pictures, they immediately assume that the idealism of the world is the truth, and that’s just depressing.
This is what the media tells us:
- You have to be pretty, not some of the time, but all of the time, because looks are very important.
- You have to be rich, because there are so many beautiful things that money can buy.
- You have to sexual, because all sexed-up girls get the boys, and all hot boys will get all the girls.
- You need to have a boyfriend or girlfriend, because only ugly people don’t.
Here is what’s wrong with what the media tells us:
- Pretty is subjective, but because there seemed to be a standard, more and more people turn to artificial enhancements and plastic surgery. There is a limit to the products and procedures before it gets unhealthy. I’m not saying that you should just forget the importance of dressing the part, but it should not be the thing that will define you. Surely, you have more to offer than just your looks.
- Rich people can buy more pretty things, but wealth is not the end game. So many people want to fit in with the glamorous lifestyle that they’d do anything to get things, even if it means getting in debt or crossing a line. If today’s society is willing to compromise dignity and character for status, then something is definitely wrong, and it’s time to sort out our priorities.
- “Sexy” is not all that it’s cracked up to be. I am not saying that being overweight or obese is good. But remember that we are made with different body mass and type. Some are big-boned. Others naturally have more fat. The thing with making size zero normal is that it can get unhealthy. We shouldn’t find the need to subject ourselves to a standard size — especially because, zero is not a size to aspire to. As Sophia Bush put it in One Tree Hill:
- Having a special someone is not hearts and roses. If you are afraid that no one will love you, don’t be. There is so much that life has to offer, and sometimes being in a committed relationship limits that, especially if it’s not the right kind. So don’t be in a relationship for the sake of being in one. The right person will eventually come along, and it will not be perfect, but it will be beautiful.
The bigger problem about these crazy ideals fed to us is that these seemingly superficial issues about beauty make more and more people determined to fit in to the ideal type, and it makes them depressed when they cannot achieve those goals. Beauty and (wrong) relationships may be superficial, but their effects are not.
Bullying is an issue that should be addressed. Anorexia and Bulimia are serious illnesses. Depression is only the beginning of more problems like addiction and self-mutilation. Suicide deals with life and death.
And all these? All these happen because too many people believe in the kind of idealism that the media fed them. Because of the unattainable perfection that people are exposed to, they learn to hate themselves for not achieving what they thought they should be.
And they shouldn’t hate themselves because what they see on magazines and on TV are practically unattainable.
What people need is love. Love for themselves. They need acceptance. Not from their peers, but from the critic in their heads, because the truth is that the voice inside you is cruel, but as long as you love yourself, you will be okay, and people will love you as you are. If they won’t, then they are not worth keeping, are they?
If you think that you are unlovable, you are wrong, but even so, if in the one in a hundred billion chance that you’re right, remember that even the prettiest, sexiest, richest people are unlovable if they are cruel, so instead of obsessing about how you look, work on how you think and act, because these are longer lasting than beauty which will soon fade away.
Learn to love yourself, because you are worth it. I’m trying to do the same for me, too.
And that, my dears, is what my Love Project is all about.